Town Down Under

Have you got a game, book or movie you'd like to make a story out of? Want to expand on a story or plot that stopped? Have an original idea for a story that you want to post somewhere? Here's where to do it. Basically an RPG where one player controls ALL characters in the story.

Town Down Under

Postby Raptor Llama » Sat Oct 25, 2008 8:34 pm

This was done for a creative writing assignment. We were supposed to write a short story. Well, I would post it here, but I already uploaded it to fiction press, where it's been nicely divided and done. So here's the link: http://www.fictionpress.com/s/2585136/1/Town_Down_Under
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Postby Doc 42 » Sat Nov 01, 2008 9:29 pm

May I just say about this story....

wow

That was really really good. It was funny, interesting, had a bit of action in it, but most importantly. It dragged me into it. The first and second chapters were really good, after that they seemed to rush along, but thats the case with alot of short stories.

I dont know how big a gap was between the writing of this and Godzilla vs Megatron, but they really dont compare. The quality in Town Down Under is amazing.

I cant say I agree with the message it portrayed at the end, but I suppose not living in a zombie appocolypse I cant say anything :P

Oh, the bonus at the end was absaloute gold. I was falling off my chair reading it.
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Postby Raptor Llama » Tue Nov 04, 2008 2:13 am

Glad you enjoyed it doc.

The reason it's rust near the end is because the teacher said "okay today is the last day of writing." So I was like "WTF?" and got it finished. When I revised it, I lengthened chapter II and added the last chapter and prologue. Then I uploaded it to fiction press.

Just got it graded today. I got a solid 100 and the teacher said not to stop writing and that it's better then 12th grader stuff. I really wouldn't say that, but I really don't know, but it is saying something since I'm only in 8th grade and I'm 12 (well, I'll be thirteen in 10 days.) But, I think I'll do well in creative writing.

And really glad you enjoyed that bonus, because that bugger took me about an hour to translate through google translator and another 30 minutes getting all the foreign words translated back, most of which didn't even work.

As for Godzilla Vs Megatron, I think I wrote that in 7th grade, I'm not sure, but I know I lost interest in the project and dropped it. I might rewrite it someday.
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Postby Doc 42 » Tue Nov 04, 2008 7:19 pm

Damn it man, you deserve a solid 100.

Im 16 and I would be danm proud to have wrote that.

Mostly because of how the characters were expanded. In a short few pages you manage to highlight the main characters and have us relate to them. I personally admit that am'nt very good at that. I doubt I could have done it any better and i'm in 4th year (dunno what that is in american... but i'd say my second last year of High School (I'm doing an extra, optional year atm))

I mostly make up for my lack of character development with visualisation. While people won't relate to my characters, they can usually see the scene just as I imagined it.

Also, the whole set up of the 'Looters' was really well done, like how they had the rules and stuff. It really made for a more convincing story than most zombie appocolypses which are usually just journeys through said appcolypse with no past or future existence laid out.

again, huge thumbs up. Keep writing dude, I'd love to see a fanfic like that come alive on this site.
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