Shattered

Have a Creative Writing style that doesn't fit in Fan Fics or RPGs? Here's the place for it!

Shattered

Postby momo_girl » Wed Aug 15, 2007 10:49 pm

This was not meant to be a rhyming poem. Some of the phrases just ended up that way.

Shattered

An endless state to which I cannot wake.
The blackest void which I cannot escape.
Darkness comes and takes control
My life lay shattered upon the floor.
I know not this place
Yet familiar it seems,
With untold stories
And forgotten dreams.
It reveals my nightmares
And crushes my hope,
Destroying what's left
Of my broken soul

Storm(not as good as my last one)

How many days does it take?
How many nights are sleepless?
When you hear them, you lose faith.
The thunder and flash,
The restless sea,
And pitch black clouds
With a promise of pitch black dreams.
The wind begins to howl,
The rain begins to fall,
The chill sets in,
And darkness surounds all.
Your faith has not failed,
The clouds are cast aside,
The sun was waiting,
The earth is alive.

Gift From the Gods

Hooves, heavy brething, the sounds of stone.
Horse, strongly built, running along the pebbles.
Man, kind faced and proud.
Stop.
The snow melts slowly,
The river, no longer frozen.
Horse hooves ripple the water.
Listen.
Gifts from the gods surround him,
Animal, plants, rocks, water.
The river reflection is not his own,
He resembles a gift from the gods.
Look.
They look like you too.

Sick
You make me sick.
You break up with your girlfriend
And blame this girl.
She had nothing but respect for you
And you let her down.
She was forced to break up with her boyfriend,
And you tell her, he doesn't care.
Do you know she's anorexic?
Do you know she has depression issues?
She's had thoughts of suicide,
Cuts herself badly too.
If you knew all that,
Why?
You made her cry,
And made her want to die.
I hope you're happy.

My Uncle’s Kitten

Soft baby fur,
Long skinny tail,
Cute fur covered ears,
Long twitchy whiskers,
And big round and sweet eyes.
Chasing bugs up the walls,
Getting tangled in string,
Drinking milk,
Playing with toys,
Hiding under the bed,
And….
Opening doors?!
That’s one talented kitten!

Nosebleed!

Once,
Twice,
Five times,
Ten times.
In the car,
In the pool,
Out for soccer,
At my new school,
On hot days,
And before that too.
Sent to the office,
Removing clots,
Gross!
Nasty!
Disgusting!
Went to the hospital once,
Got a vein cauterized,
That was that.
.....
Once,
Twice...
Here we go again!

Passion

I have a passion for the Asian culture.
I know more about their landscape,
Than I know about my home.
I care more about their history
Than I do about mine.
I've fallen in love with the languages
And will soon take a class for one.
But most of all,
Their music helped set my dream
To learn many, many languages.
I guess my passion
Has turned to obsession.

In the Sky

I look to the skys
With tears in my eyes
I wish I could go there
And see sights so rare.

I want to race with a comet
I want to circle a planet.
I'd risk everything to jump and sing
Why not risk dancing on Saturn's ring?

I want to touch a wandering star
And wonder how it got this far.
I want to drift through space
Wearing a smiling face.

But I want you to see.
So come to space with me.
This is more important to me than all the rest
Float with me on this quest.

Dreams and wishes, that's what these are
They're hard to catch, like falling stars.
But I'll risk it all and learn to fly,
'Cause my heart, mind, and soul are in the sky!
Last edited by momo_girl on Thu Apr 10, 2008 9:34 pm, edited 5 times in total.
User avatar
momo_girl
Worm
Worm
 
Posts: 21
Joined: Fri Jun 29, 2007 8:06 pm

Postby Doc 42 » Wed Aug 15, 2007 11:12 pm

Nicely done, I love the first 4 lines, it makes you think about what the poem is about and what has happened to make this person feel in such away
User avatar
Doc 42
Cool Guy Moderator
Cool Guy Moderator
 
Posts: 8613
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2007 9:20 pm
Location: Ireland

Postby momo_girl » Thu Aug 16, 2007 5:46 am

Thanks! I don't usually get compliments on my work. Most of my poetry sucks.
Image
User avatar
momo_girl
Worm
Worm
 
Posts: 21
Joined: Fri Jun 29, 2007 8:06 pm

Postby C S » Thu Aug 16, 2007 5:49 am

this is great. thats all i can say. good job.

PS: Momo means peach in Japaneese?!


never knew that
"Saturn was NOT a Single Lady." - Unknown
User avatar
C S
Bae Fish
Bae Fish
 
Posts: 20150
Joined: Sat May 19, 2007 11:34 pm

Postby momo_girl » Thu Aug 16, 2007 5:52 am

Thanks! And yes, momo means peach. It was in a Japanese dictionary that I got from the library^^
Image
User avatar
momo_girl
Worm
Worm
 
Posts: 21
Joined: Fri Jun 29, 2007 8:06 pm

Postby C S » Thu Aug 16, 2007 5:56 am

look foward for more
"Saturn was NOT a Single Lady." - Unknown
User avatar
C S
Bae Fish
Bae Fish
 
Posts: 20150
Joined: Sat May 19, 2007 11:34 pm

Postby momo_girl » Thu Aug 16, 2007 7:04 pm

I just posted a new one.
Image
User avatar
momo_girl
Worm
Worm
 
Posts: 21
Joined: Fri Jun 29, 2007 8:06 pm

Postby Doc 42 » Thu Aug 16, 2007 7:06 pm

I love his line:
And pitch black clouds
With a promise of pitch black dreams.

nice poem
User avatar
Doc 42
Cool Guy Moderator
Cool Guy Moderator
 
Posts: 8613
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2007 9:20 pm
Location: Ireland

Postby momo_girl » Fri Aug 17, 2007 11:05 pm

Thanks again!

I added a new poem. I made this one in class from an Indian picture.
Image
User avatar
momo_girl
Worm
Worm
 
Posts: 21
Joined: Fri Jun 29, 2007 8:06 pm

Postby C S » Fri Aug 17, 2007 11:10 pm

hmmm...guess the meaning of this poem is that the passing of the seasons brings many changes and life which are the "gifts"

I love it.

makes you think alittle...

my head hurts :lol:
"Saturn was NOT a Single Lady." - Unknown
User avatar
C S
Bae Fish
Bae Fish
 
Posts: 20150
Joined: Sat May 19, 2007 11:34 pm

Postby momo_girl » Mon Aug 27, 2007 3:28 am

Haha!

I posted a new one. It's based on a true story in my life. My friend is anorexic and has bipolar. She was just told by another friend that her boyfriend didn't care about her and now she's upset and I'm really mad. So this is kind of a vent for how I feel.
Image
User avatar
momo_girl
Worm
Worm
 
Posts: 21
Joined: Fri Jun 29, 2007 8:06 pm

Postby C S » Mon Aug 27, 2007 3:43 am

thats, thats....sick..... :evil:

i feel like i need to swim in the pond but im too scare cause of that ghost legend :evil:
"Saturn was NOT a Single Lady." - Unknown
User avatar
C S
Bae Fish
Bae Fish
 
Posts: 20150
Joined: Sat May 19, 2007 11:34 pm

Postby Doc 42 » Mon Aug 27, 2007 4:46 am

Wow nice poem... Really makes you angry at the person responsible...
User avatar
Doc 42
Cool Guy Moderator
Cool Guy Moderator
 
Posts: 8613
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2007 9:20 pm
Location: Ireland

Postby momo_girl » Tue Sep 04, 2007 4:43 am

And I WAS mad at him and still am! But I'm better now that I wrote that.

I have 3 new poems up. The first is one I wrote to cheer my friend up. She loves cats so I wrote it for her. I based it on my uncle's cat that can open doors^^. The second I'm not so sure I should have put up. It is a true story about me though, I did go to the hospital for a nosebleed once. The last one is also true, and tomorrow I will be taking a class to learn Japanese (I'm SOOOOOOOO excited!)!
Image
User avatar
momo_girl
Worm
Worm
 
Posts: 21
Joined: Fri Jun 29, 2007 8:06 pm

Postby TyrantTR » Wed Oct 17, 2007 3:31 am

I like these, I think. But I'm a brother so I gotta pretend to be harsh.

As you can see, I got all the pen and paper talents, she got all the word document and inspiration talents. We are a complete family. :P Go me? But yeah, the one about your freind is good, I know the whole story, so belive me she WAS upset.
Well James Bond Chinchilla and Monsta Pacman gets old after a year or so of absence. >_> Methinks I'll leave this blank until I come up with something to put here.
User avatar
TyrantTR
Albertosaurus
Albertosaurus
 
Posts: 1891
Joined: Sun Jan 21, 2007 9:55 pm
Location: im in ur couch steelin ur change

Postby CRUSHER IS KING » Thu Mar 06, 2008 1:39 am

they are all good, but I have to agree with TTR, because like him I am a brother.
CRUSHER IS KING
Banned
 
Posts: 331
Joined: Sun Dec 02, 2007 5:23 pm
Location: South Carolina, USA

Postby The Kingpin » Thu Mar 06, 2008 12:29 pm

CIK, this is your FIFTH time bumping a dead topic. as a result, your are now banned from the site for a day for breaking the rules over 3 times...
"Ah yes, organised chaos. the sign of a clever but ever-busy mind. To the perpetrator, a carefully woven web of belongings and intrigue, but to the bystander? Madness!"
–William Beckett, Lore of Leyuna RPG

Image
User avatar
The Kingpin
Webmaster
Webmaster
 
Posts: 22568
Joined: Thu Jan 01, 1970 12:00 am
Location: Qurain, Kuwait

Postby momo_girl » Thu Apr 10, 2008 9:39 pm

I know it's been forever since I posted but I finally have a new poem. Enjoy!
Image
User avatar
momo_girl
Worm
Worm
 
Posts: 21
Joined: Fri Jun 29, 2007 8:06 pm

Postby mega raptor » Thu Apr 10, 2008 11:25 pm

I like it, I like the feeling of wanderlust that effects me-I tend to get the feeling that there's a lot more to the world than I see, that I can get to right now, and I think your poem captures that feeling pretty well.
It's you and me against the world. We attack at dawn.

This is the way the world ends. Not with a bang but with a whimper. - T.S. Eliot
mega raptor
Butterfly
Butterfly
 
Posts: 649
Joined: Sat Aug 26, 2006 2:51 pm
Location: Dublin, OH


Return to Poetry & Other Written Arts

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests

cron