How Would You Conquer The World?

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Postby Evil Eye » Tue Aug 10, 2010 8:20 pm

This thread makes me laugh and cry at the same time.
Down on your marrowbones and pray!
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Postby TyrannoTitan » Tue Aug 10, 2010 8:21 pm

So you can just shovel the ash away, but said ash is able to CRUSH STRUCTURES?

Fail plan is fail.
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Postby Giratina93 » Tue Aug 10, 2010 8:35 pm

-_____- You do realize that I'll be shoveling away the ash from the cave entrance BEFORE it gets too large.. besides, it takes a certain ammount of ash to break through the roofs of buildings and stuff... plus, caves are far more durable than your typical food storage warehouse...
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Postby TyrannoTitan » Tue Aug 10, 2010 8:56 pm

Aaand the food storage wouldn't have people doing the same thing, removing the ash before it gets too bad?

And how do you know the cave is stable? Cave-ins are very common.
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Postby Giratina93 » Wed Aug 11, 2010 12:49 am

The people trying to get the ash off of their food storages will be too busy trying to keep away the thousands of people swarming theirs for food and shelter... Doomsday tends to bring out that kind of thing in people, where they all panic and crush each other in an attempt to save themselves...

Thankfully, I have thought of that beforehands, and I will reinforce the cave walls and ceiling with steel... of course, I'll have to block off parts of said cave, with signs saying, "Rabid bats" or "SLeeping bears"... and if th eoccasional daredevil tries to get through, he'll get killed by me personally, and the blame for the death will be on said sleeping bear...

This is getting too complicated for me...
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Postby TyrannoTitan » Wed Aug 11, 2010 1:09 am

Uh, the only immediately effected area would be the park itself and the state its located in. Its not like the country will go immediately into panic. The government will take control and food will be rationed. People aren't ganna storm the grocery stores going "I NEED FOOD SUDDENLY", when they already probably HAVE food.

And seriously, no one is going to notice giant shipments of steel going to a remote town in Alaska? And they won't find it so bloody convenient that you had a food shelter capable of withstanding EXACTLY this disaster? And you think that the people who, according to you, would swarm and steal food from the storage, will just listen to you for having food? No, they'd kill or incapacitate you and take the food for themselves, or the government would seize it so it could be rationed.

FAIL PLAN IS FAIL.
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Postby Giratina93 » Wed Aug 11, 2010 1:19 am

......

DANGIT!

WHen I made that plan, I thought it was foolproof... It was the best plan I had, the VERY BEST! I was certain not even the Kingpin could be able to rip it apart... Yet he hires YOU, and YOU don't just rip it apart, you blow it up! Oh well... atleast every single plan here has horrible flaws in it...
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Postby TyrannoTitan » Wed Aug 11, 2010 1:59 am

KP didn't "hire me" to do it, I decided to do it because he didn't seem interested :P
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Postby Godzilla Forever » Wed Aug 11, 2010 2:10 am

Hmmm..... I'll give this a shot.

Firstly, I will go to law school for 10 years. Then, I will try and hire a group of assassins to take out all the important world leaders, and, if this fails, I will attempt to create a rebel group to protest the US government. After this, I will send my protest group into several different countries to cause general havok. Then, while all this chaos is going around, I will create a secret group of assassins to (try again if failed the first time) kill the important leaders of the world. At this point, the world will be in complete chaos, and I will slowly crawl up the ranks in the government. I will try and fix everything I can, since I had caused all the havok (I could jsut tell the people to stop what they're doing and I'll pay them) and dispose of my assassin group. If I do well, the world may think me as a real good leader and decide for me to become absolute ruler of the world. Then my rule will begin!

I really tried. I really did on this one.

Total time: About 20 years or so
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Postby The Kingpin » Wed Aug 11, 2010 9:47 am

pah. Gira, if i wasn't so bored of listening to your failboat plans i WOULD'VE ripped it apart....but by this point the holes in them are so numerous the plans sink by themselves, without assistance from me...


let's see...G4E...


hiring a group of assassins is much more difficult than it sounds. it's not like you can look up 'Elite Assassin Groups' in the yellow pages. even if you hire a group, there's no guarantee that they're not simply a band of common criminals promising to kill for money. government trained squads of spies and assassins have trouble getting into a position to assassinate one world leader, and that's after the country they work for has toyed with politics in such a way that it causes the target leader to expose himself for a shot. then you have the ridiculous amount of security that is placed around a world leader when they're exposed...

rebel groups are overrated. riot squads are made to deal with this sort of thing. simply sending a bunch of guys to cause mayhem somewhere isn't gonna get you anywhere. hell, look at Thailand. they had a huge riot due to civil unrest. literally hundreds of people involved, maybe more [can't remember the details. i remember it happened though], and yet, the riot squads managed to quell it after a while [though admittedly Thailand declared a national state of emergency].


climbing up the ranks of a government can take a lifetime unless you play your cards right. Look at McCain. he's 73 and still isn't president [sure he got close, but the fact remains he isn't].


disposing of an assassin group that is capable of taking out world leaders? chances are, by the time you find a way to dispose of them, they'll have already discovered and assassinated you instead. likely on the payroll of some other greedy power hungry politician that wants rid of you :P
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Postby Godzilla Forever » Wed Aug 11, 2010 2:17 pm

Drat. Flaws have been discovered!
"If none can know what lies ahead, then losing one's way is just human nature."~ Yoshimitsu

"Would you hear my desire? To take this foul blade, and use it to blot out the light forever!" ~ Ganondorf
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Postby raptor33 » Thu Aug 12, 2010 1:30 pm

Where there's a plan, there's a flaw. It is the law of evil-plan-making.

........
Nuther shot this is.

I will spend years taking flight lessons until I can fly a small plane without GPS. Then....

....I'll hack into a satiliete computer, sending it towards other satilietes, taking down the GPS system, causing planes navigation to fail, ship travel to become too dangerous for public transport, and people would be lost where ever they are without GPS.

Then I'd get rich selling maps until I can buy a private plane and fly to Yellowstone, where I jump out and crash the plane into the super volcano.

I'll save you the trouble and pick out the ONLY flaw in this....

1) HOW THE HELL WOULD I HACK A SATILITE? They would trace meand kill me anyways!
You've lost the game,
The game of life,
So drop your pain,
And leave your strife.
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Postby Evil Eye » Thu Aug 12, 2010 4:47 pm

...and there's also the fact that getting rid of the GPS wont really do anything. There was still trade and transport before GPS was made.

and yes. They will BACK-TRACE YOU, SO CONSEQUENCES WILL NEVER BE THE SAME!

and lastly, what makes you think selling maps would make you rich?

Your plan sounds like a parody of one :razz: if it were that easy, someone woulda tried it already.
Down on your marrowbones and pray!
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Postby raptor33 » Thu Aug 12, 2010 8:44 pm

dude, we are DEPENDANT on GPS NOW because we HAVE GOT USED TO IT so we now RELY ON GPS.

And big, huge comercial jets? The pilot can't see that well from the cockpit. I've tried.

I GIVE UP! CONQUERING THE WORLD IS TOO HARD!

I'll just go back to selling Poetry.
You've lost the game,
The game of life,
So drop your pain,
And leave your strife.
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Postby Godzilla Forever » Thu Aug 12, 2010 8:46 pm

raptor33 wrote:dude, we are DEPENDANT on GPS NOW because we HAVE GOT USED TO IT so we now RELY ON GPS.

And big, huge comercial jets? The pilot can't see that well from the cockpit. I've tried.

I GIVE UP! CONQUERING THE WORLD IS TOO HARD!

I'll just go back to selling Poetry.

There's magical thing called a map. People use that more often than GPS still. Also, big planes have radar, but not all have GPS.
"If none can know what lies ahead, then losing one's way is just human nature."~ Yoshimitsu

"Would you hear my desire? To take this foul blade, and use it to blot out the light forever!" ~ Ganondorf
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Postby raptor33 » Thu Aug 12, 2010 8:54 pm

DID YOU HEAR ME?!? I QUIT TRYING O RULE THE WORLD!

STOP NITPICKING MY PLOT, BECAUSE I QUIT! (the topic)
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The game of life,
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And leave your strife.
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Postby The Kingpin » Thu Aug 12, 2010 9:18 pm

you can quit. still fun to detonate plots...


another thing. part of mandatory pilot training is operating the aircraft without the electronic systems. pilots who fly commercial jets can and do fly them without radar, GPS, Auto-Pilot or Navigation Assistance. all they really need is communication with the tower and the lights on the aircraft. maps and traditional navigation equipment will do the rest...
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Postby Giratina93 » Fri Aug 13, 2010 1:09 am

WHy would I ever give up on world domination? No matter the holes, no matter what the cost, it's fun! :D

Stage 1 will consist of me sneaking into a millitary silo and firing off a few missles at various parts of the country. Of course, the millitary will shoot them down, but with all their attention focused on th emissles, there will be no one to guard the WHite House. I'll hire a person to disguise themself as a Secret Service man for a few thousand dollars, which I earned from my job. That person will sneak around to behind the white house, then plant a few bombs there, then detonate them, blowing himself and the white house up, hopefully while the president, Vice-president, and all the cabinet's in there. The country will fall into chaos as there will be no one to lead them now, as as we all know, leaderless people become savages. They'll fight amongst each other. Crime rates will EXPLODE, with the local police forces being overrun. All this time, I'll have recruited an army of thugs and gangsters, (Whom I'll keep under my control with promises of lotsa money, and anything else they got. If they refuse, i'll just torture them in the most painful an dhumiliating of ways). Once the time is ripe, I'll have them crown me as the ruler of America, and they'll enforce my dictatorship upon everyone else. Then, I'll use the millitary (WHich I'lll have planted some of my thugs into to corrupt it) to go out and conquer the world, until it's all one nation, the nation of THE GREAT KING GIRATINA!
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Postby Iceking » Fri Aug 13, 2010 1:35 am

I see a big problem with the first part of your plan, Gira. First, it would take a long time of training for someone to be able to sneak into a military base and even then, success would be a gamble. If you tried to disguise yourself as someone who worked in the base, you would have to know everything that he did to blend in convincingly and the enterance to the room where the missle firing button is would be well guarded.
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Postby Giratina93 » Fri Aug 13, 2010 2:03 am

I wouldn't have to disguise myself to sneak in... Just have to be stealthy and avoid the cameras of death... as for it being heavily guarded, I'll just wait until they'r eon lunch break. Less security at that time means an easier job for the king of all that is awsome!
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