by TyrannoTitan » Sun Nov 02, 2008 6:50 pm
CS, easy. If you want to help Spinax improve the character or even the story, that's one thing, but continuing to argue about Crusher's status compared to Spinax's is a no-no.
Anyway, Spinax, all I can say is improve your spelling and grammar. Just take more time on FanFics, make sure everything is spelled correctly and make sure a chapter is larger then just a few sentences.
As for character development, even the TITLE of this FanFic would cause confusion; it sounds like a sequel to a book or something. Its like giving someone the 4th book in a series, without letting them read the first 3, and expecting them to know everything about it.
My advice is to make a fanfic in which you describe Spinax's rise to power in whatever world he is in. Again, the fanfic was just making us ASSUME who these characters were, not giving any background on them at all.
And finally, as for Spinax being the King of dinosaurs: WHY is he king? I mean, The Kingpin has explained Crusher's background in Isla Sorna Stories, and has even acted out major parts of his life within the RPG, and all of that experience resulted in him becoming the most dominant predator. He didn't kill ONE dinosaur to become the King; he had A LOT of enemies from very early on in his life, and the fact that he managed to overcome them as well as raise a family and survive on a place as dangerous as Sorna, made him a very impressive character, and deserving of his title.
See where I'm going with this? To us, Spinax is a random dinosaur, and you can't be angered by that fact. You have made no move to PROVE Spinax's title, just said "He is King" and left it at that...